talisman

poetry won't make things better

but it makes things feel better

even if only in this moment

poetry doesn't take away the moods

it definitely doesn't unsay the said things

or unsees the hard looks

it is a bit of a panacea

a lovely soft ball of cotton wool

easing the wound and sheltering it from sight

i do not write this poem to undo anything

maybe to unknot something

 - a tightness

     -  a forgetfulness

 - a mindless habit

maybe my poem is simply a talisman

to tie around my wrist

to sing into my veins

to call the rhythm and beauty

back after the fall

for now lie a little bit

gently stroke the wounds

whisper that i forgive myself

patterns go deep

it is okay to fall into

the same trap many twices thrices over

and over and over

nature is instinct

and habit-forming

but come here to this poem

forget about the habits

 - good or bad - 

writing is a wave that shapes over time

it can not become pernicious

or malicious

there are much too many

pauses and daydreaming 

and blinking and erasing 

and rephrasing in writing for it 

to become an ill intention

a spiteful business

or

a bad habit

write for goodness' sake!

it is one way

to keep myself from falling

if it is not myself i shall keep upright

then let it be my pencil!